Letters of Mass Construction

Posted in Random Musings

Skeptically Yours

I have always marveled at what people will believe in. I am not even talking about some of the bigger whoppers out there. Like people’s gods. My god is better than your god. Is there a god? No, I am talking about email scams, magic, aliens from another planet, that we have a say in how our government is run (sorry, Bitter Bob slipped in there for a moment).

I mean seriously, aliens from another planet. Not that I don’t believe in the possibility that somewhere out there in the multitude of galaxies intelligent life exist (I sometimes question if it exists on this planet). What I have a hard time swallowing is that any creature that has the technology to cross galaxies arrives at our little corner of the universe and kidnaps farmer Todd in order to practice deep and meaningful experiments. If farmer Todd wanders into his house smelling of alcohol and unable to sit down, he should be able to come up with a better story than aliens. Try a mistress in Argentina, that one seems to be working lately.

For all of you that I have offended for dismissing your deep and abiding belief in aliens I will make it up to you. Go to the nearest bookstore and buy Little Green Men by Christopher Buckley. It’s like truth serum and should be required reading.

I love talking with people who believe that magic is real. Any kind of magic, from Criss Angel to fairies. I love magic. I adore reading fantasy novels. I would like to make a living at writing them. I do not believe that anyone can read minds, tell the future, or make the Statue of Liberty disappear. I would like to believe it, it sounds cool. If someone can show me scientifically its existence I will climb on that train. I grew up on fantasy. Magic is a trick, plain and simple. Fairies don’t exist (neither does the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, the Abominable Snowman or Neil Gaiman’s hair, while I am swinging away at myths).

Again I know that I am probably doing undo injury to your psyche. I offer up in exchange, anything by Penn & Teller. In particular if you can catch their live show, make sure that you do. If not live then rent a DVD, do a google search. You’ll thank me for it later.

If you’re one of those people that falls for the Nigerian email scam, I can’t help you. If you believe in rich men unable to access their funds while living under an evil totalitarian regime, you deserve to lose your money. Sorry, that was a little harsh, let me try again. Don’t be stupid, try using some critical thinking skills, read a book.

I have never really thought of myself as a skeptical person but I clearly fall into that category. It’s kind of interesting because I want to believe, I really do. I think aliens are cool. If magic was possible I would stand in line to buy it. Pictures of the Loch Ness monster, sign me up. My problem is I keep letting rational thoughts and empirical data get into my head. Those damn things will ruin all your fun.

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